I will not stop complaining about social media

October 21th, 2024

It's another one of these posts lads, but hopefully they'll stop being so frequent with the steps I'm taking.

A tale old as time, I'm trying to drastically cut down on social media in my casual life.

Today is the first day I'm taking real steps, as I tried yesterday and horribly failed! I was actually cutting down on it last week but then twitter decided to cut off their own legs (removing blocking essentially and forcing users to agree to AI scraping of their data). So now everyone is rushing over the bluesky, but for like, real this time. And enjoying themselves momentarily.

As a self employed person who would like to continue to be able to take commissions going forward, I of course gotta rebuild over there. I was already in the process of using it more professionally, but now it's like, go go go! Get posting! Make sure people know you exist!! So my tamed brainrot was allowed to go feral for a few days there

Ah well, quitting addictions is not a simple matter. There's a lot of valleys and highs, ya know?

And it is an addiction. I've been addicted to reading what people say on the internet for 23 slutty slutty years now. Hell, earlier, but Gaia Online was the first forum I joined.

So I've bounced around, reading everything in my path since then, from gaia to misc forums + webcomics, to 4chan and then tumblr and then twitter to now bluesky(with a whole lotta discord in there too!!!).

I've always just wanted to read what the people have to say!!! I've never been the chattiest myself, sometimes in spurts, I'm da lurker baby.

But I need to change that so by god I'm trying again for the sake of myself, my creativity, my ability to fucking exist as more than a pile of sludge!!!

I'm just, gonna do my best. And accept I can always do better, even if I slip. I'd ideally like to do a full dopamine deprivation month sometime but I think I'd explode if I tried to mix that with having to do my job. Especially right now when I'm just making a fuck ton of bats every day. I can only do that so long without youtube to keep me company!!!

So, day 2!! I failed yesterday but by god it counts! I can't just keep having day 1 forever until it works!

Today I woke up, spent a few minutes checking bsky and then twitter and then fucked off of them. Good job me. I do want to stop doing that, take my phone outta my bedroom at night, but I didn't do that last night so the usual routine occured.

At lunch time, I checked bsky and twitter for a total of like 1 minute just to see notifications and then yeeted myself out.

I reorganized my phone so it'll be more annoying to get on google(i don't use phone apps for social media) and decided that if I'm taking a break that includes phone time I'm going to default to playing colour picross n shit. I even moved google somewhere else and just replaced the quick shortcut with google maps because that's a more important app!!

Tonight I'll allow myself one more quick check to make sure things are in order, and then try to keep my phone outta the room when I go to bed.

It's not like anyone is calling me generally, so there's no pressing matters that makes it so I NEED it nearby. Just my insanity.

I wish I like, lived with someone who could steal away my access to these things so I didn't have to battle my own lack of discipline, but I don't! So I have to do it on my fucking own! Again! And Again! Until it works!!!

Good luck! Good fucking luck to me!! This is all I'm going to be chattering about for the next while I'm sorry!! I need to hyperfixate on fixing myself!!!

Anyways, on other news, this is the jam of the month.